A Racer’s Perspective III: General tips and Obstacle What!?

Obstacle What!?  One of the more popular races on GTA Online.  I admit, it is fun, and is taken right out of the Dukes of Hazzard.  Long jumps, big crashes, and lots of fun!  However, I thought I would post up about what I consider to be the “ideal line” through the course, which might not be what you think it is…

Then that got me thinking.  Should I write up a blog about ideal racing lines period?  I started to, but I also know that this has been written about for YEARS, so instead of re-inventing the wheel, I have linked a short but helpful article on what ideal racing lines are and how to use them.


Something that is not covered by the article are tips on drifting.  I will say this: don’t do it.  And if you are going to do it, make it SMALL.  I have read articles that claim that a small drift at corner exit might be the fastest way through a turn.  There ARE tracks irl where drifting is necessary to be faster, but in my experiences here (even on the gta drift tracks) grip style racing is simply faster.  JUMPING (for obvious reasons I suppose) also is not covered.  In GTA, using stick button, you can control the pitch and roll of the vehicle you are driving while in flight (think of it as moving weight around, push the stick forward, and the car will pitch forward, pull back, and the car will pitch back).  In the video posted below, go to 1:52 and you can see that I am actually controlling the bike in mid-air.

Furthermore, I stick the landing.  This is why controlling your vehicle is crucial to racing, as you can manipulate your car in mid-air.  In order to maintain speed, I try to land on all fours with full throttle, with maybe a little bias towards the rear.  I noticed on bikes, specifically, if you have a long way to fall, I stick the landing more often than not when I land the rear wheel first.  If you really want to jump far, back flipping will increase your jumping distance, conversely, front flipping will decrease your jumping distance.  If you don’t want to screw it up, make SURE you have room to rotate fully, otherwise you are going to jump further and come to a stop (or roll or whatever), so be mindful that flipping DOES take time to complete a full rotation.

Having said all of that, my next recommendation is to stay on the ground.  Whenever possible, stay on the ground.  The only time I would go for big air is if I have a long runway after the jump and can carry maximum speed all the way through the jump and after (which I admit, many jumps you will run across are this way).  If you have a turn or obstacle in front of you, I recommend making your jump short, and getting all of your wheels on the ground so that you can have grip (you have zero grip when you are airborne).  OR YOU CAN JUST GO AROUND.  I see a lot of jumps on GTA that have wide open areas to go around the jump completely.

Blatant Transition to Obstacle What?!

That is the thing about Obstacle What, there are tons of opportunities to go around.  If you want to hit all of the jumps and get big air and so forth, that is fine, but I feel I have a good idea of where the ideal line through Obstacle What is from start to finish (with a couple of questionable tactics) if your priority is getting to the finish line first.

Pick your vehicle wisely

I wish I could use this car.  I really really do, and wear a cowboy hat while I do it.  Problem is, the classes for this race are limited.  I wrote in a previous article about catch up and slipstream.  If catch up is ON, then I would use cars that have good acceleration and good top speed BOTH (Zentorno, Dinka Akuma, Massacro Racecar).  If catch up is OFF, then I would use something with the most top speed (just don’t crash too much), Adder, Jester Racecar, Carbonizarre, Hakuchou…

I originally had three or four races saved to my DVR, where you can literally see the difference in speed in going over the jumps versus some of the routes I recommend, but my Upload Studios is not  allowing me to upload anything (or edit) so I am going to run through a play-by-play using the video posted below.  Pay attention because my alternative routes go right from the start.  So right from the get-go, I say this: have a look around at the start of the race.  Are you on the left side of the track?  Can you get to the left side of the track before the freeway median?  If you can get into the oncoming traffic’s lanes early (and you dodge oncoming traffic), you will find yourself quite a bit ahead of the competition when the rest of the field hits the first jump.

0:14 seconds into the video, the concrete median arises.  Stay in the opposite lane, but graze the wall as closely as you can.  If you don’t you might miss the checkpoint completely, and that is the last thing you need pulling off a stunt like this.  You will pass the jumps that everyone else will have to go over, and at 0:22 seconds, merge back over into the correct lanes (through the construction cones).

0:34 pass the red box and then pull to the right to go up and over the bridge as this is faster than jumping the whole thing.  On your way down the ramp, hug the wall on the left a little bit to make sure you do not miss the checkpoint.

0:54 cross over into the opposite lanes again, but this time pull far left without driving off of the highway completely.  This is a gamble because you are pulling WAY off of the heterodox line, so the gain is minimal AND you run the risk of slamming into the wrong side of the ramps coming the other direction.  But I am convinced this is faster (if successfully done) than hitting the jumps normally.  At 1:03 you can merge back through the cones into the right lanes.  If you are playing GTA and you are behind at 1:06 then fire a fucking rocket straight down the middle of the lanesThere are a lot of elevation changes in GTA and I know sometimes your rockets hit the ground before they hit the target.  Not here.  Fire them right down the middle lanes, as the slalom approaches, and the ideal line forces players to go towards the middle of the road to enter the slalom.

1:10 if you are ahead and REALLY want to win, fire backwards, either straight down the middle or pull EVER so slightly so that your rockets will go towards the right side of the road (right is where most good racers will line up to get ready for the slalom that is now immediately in front of you).  Cut early and close to every wall.  If you cut late, you will make the next cut late, and the next, and the next.  If you do it right, you don’t even need to brake here (MAYBE lift if you are in a super car).  Don’t brake at all when you enter, either, you can lift and get back on the gas as needed.

1:28 scoot a little to the right and miss the jumps, then get back onto business as usual.

2:12 is interesting.  I hit the jumps here because I am in a car, but if you look off to the left, there is an opening that leads off-road.  I think the Xbox One version and Xbox 360 versions are a little different, but no matter what platform you use, there is a way around these jumps through that opening.  But there is a problem.  That off-road section is bumpy.  I don’t recommend taking that shortcut if you are in a car (it is probably not a shortcut).  I HAVE blasted through that off-road section on a bike and passed several cars who went the traditional route, but even on a bike, it is sketchy.  There IS a bump and it may mess you up.  I will let you mess with that part of the track if you want, but I typically do not go that direction.

2:32 scoot to the right and miss the small jumps.  Don’t go too far off road, get back on pavement immediately to keep your speed up.

2:53 you will see that I am traveling down the ramp.  At the bottom of the ramp cut hard left, through the cones, and into oncoming traffic.  You will see the jumps you miss on the right, after you do, take the first opportunity you can to cut BACK into the right lanes and continue onto the finish line.  Even if you are not in the lead at this point, this is a GREAT shortcut and you may find yourself ahead of the competition again.  Be careful, however, there is enough road there that if someone jumped well, they might be able to draft you here.

Hope that was helpful!  As always, I am open to discussion.  More to come in episode 4 (I will do more reviews of the car classes).

Live fast, die young.

The Februari Crew Party Stories – The Big Squeeze


The year is 1931. Prohibition is nearing it’s end, though the Chicago pianos are still hot with fighting over all the giggle juice coming into the city. In the end two major players remain, the Los Santos Crime Family run by Jack Dragna and City Hall Gang run by Charles H. Crawford and Kent Kane Parrot.

Now don’t blow your wig just yet doll, there’s a few rules to consider here.

  • Team 1 represents the Los Santos Crime Family and is situated at the Sawmill. Team two represents the City Hall Gang and is situated at a small compound on the north side of the Alamo Sea.
  • Make sure you’re dressed in 1920/1930 fashion. Think bobbed hair, flapper dresses etc. I know some of you don’t have those, but creativity and lots of long skirt and suit jackets go a long way.
  • To keep it realistic, the only guns allowed are the Gusenberg Sweeper, Vintage Pistol and Musket. Again I know some of you don’t own a Gusenberg. If you are among the unlucky few, you are allowed to use any gun in the SMG section.
  • Show up for the meet in one of the following vehicles:
    • Duster (If you can manage to land it in downtown Los Santos that is)
    • Rat Loader
    • Rat Truck
    • Roosevelt
    • Z-Type
  • Though not really a rule, it is recommended to change the colours on your TV/projector to black and white. Trust me on this one, it gives it a real film noire touch.

Chapter 1: Bootleg blues

Coming soon

Chapter 2: Getting First Base

Coming soon

Chapter 3: Fly The Coop

Coming soon

Chapter4: The Chicago Typewriter

Coming soon

February Xbox 360 Crew Party

Collage 2015-02-24 21_01_44

Hey everyone, so sorry this post is late this month has been hectic for me…

So before I start I want to thank Robin, aka Gta (on the SC). They gave me the idea for this months crew party.

It will be a sort of story based party. So I’m sure you guys have all noticed how much fun we have when we just mess around at the parties (during the unstructured parts) so that’s what this month will be.

So we will all jump into our meth vans or caravans what ever you want to call them. Then we drive out to Raton canyon and “survive”. There will be some structure of course. when we get out there we will play a large game of hide and seek in a set area in free roam. Then we will move onto a cliff side fight and then we will do some mountain climbing races and parachuting all while messing around and just having a laugh.

The party will take place this Friday, the 27th of February. See you all there. Also I want to say that sonic has now been named (by me), the official xbox 360 pussi riot event coordinator and shamalamadingdong (ha, ha that’s not a real position) because of his great work at the last crew party. :D


A Racer’s Perspective II: Super Car Class Review


Easily the most “popular” class that I have run across, and I suppose for good reason.  Not that I dislike the class, but I feel as if half the servers I enter run the super car class.  As such, I thought it would be important to include it early in my reviews of the different car classes.  For this review, we will be focusing most of our attention on three cars, that are very distinct in their own way, and can be used to maximize the amount of speed you can carry through various races in GTA.  Herein, I will highlight each of the cars’ strong points as well as the best places to use them.

*Disclaimer: these are my opinions. While I love racing in GTA, the in game physics are simply not what I would call a driving simulator. Having said that, I believe the physics for a game are very good, which means strategy and knowledge are both crucial to winning races. Furthermore, many of the cars have different strengths/weaknesses and the driver is always a determining factor in winning races. These are my opinions, and I am open to discussion and alternative perspectives on these matters.*

Overflod Entity XF

This car really stands on its own in this class.  The front of the car looks like the real life Koenigsegg CC8S, which is the current record holder for the fastest speeding ticket ever issued in the United States (242mph in 2003 during the Gumball 3000 Rally Race).  Yes it is fast.  No it doesn’t suck.

The rear of the car looks very much like it took ques from the Porsche Carrera GT.

So this car definitely has style and cues from real life supercars.  But that is not what makes this car so special.  What sets this car apart from all others on GTA is the capacity for mid to high range cornering.  Low speed cornering is very good, but it excels at the mid to high range corners.  Matched with the great acceleration, when there are twisties and corners to be negotiated, no other car in the Super car class can match the speed and ease of driving of the Entity XF.

Truffade Adder

This car obviously takes its stylings from the Bugatti Veyron (without a spoiler), which was the first production car to crack the 250mph barrier.

Until this last year, the Veyron also held onto the title of “fastest production car in the world” (the Hennessey Venom GT took that title with a massive 270.49mph run).

It makes sense, then, that they Adder yields the highest top speed of any car in the game.  And with a price tag of $1,000,000 for a STOCK version of the car, it had better be.  Furthermore, the car is easy to drive, despite the high speed (the same review many give the real life Veyron).  Even in the snow, the car’s attitude is very balanced (in the video below I get clipped at 2:10 and am still able to negotiate between the concrete medians and maintain speed).

Pegassi Zentorno

The Adder was clearly a racer’s favorite car until the High Life Update introduced the Zentorno to the GTA 5 racing world.  Taking cues from Lamborghini (hard to pick ONE), the car’s styling is way over the top.  Good luck sneaking this thing anywhere.  It’s loud.  Its fast.  Its so blindingly ugly you drool over it and want one.  Yes, you want one.

Performance?  This car’s acceleration is cray cray, only getting beat out by the Coil Voltic (pictured below)

The problem with the Voltic is that it falls short in all other categories.  While it is by no means a slouch (I have been taken by surprise by a few of these), I would still pick the Zentorno over the Voltic only because it excels in all other categories over the Voltic, and is slower in terms of acceleration by a margin that is barely worth mentioning.  The Zentorno’s top speed is very close to the Adder, as is its handling to the Entity, making the Zentorno a GREAT all-around fast car.  It can handle its own in terms of top speed and cornering, but its acceleration keeps you in the race if you find yourself in trouble (see video below).

The Final Verdict

Given what I have said here and based upon what I have heard from others’ opinions on these cars, the conclusion is fairly simple: use the Adder for top speed runs, use the Entity for cornering, and if you have a mixed bag, maybe use the Zentorno, right?


It is not that simple.  While I admit, the Entity takes the cake in  terms of handling, it gets tricky when you want to tease out which car you should use between the Adder and the Zentorno.  Price is definitely a factor, but if you can afford both and mod both to their extremes, you start to ask yourself different questions:

Who are you racing?  Are they clean or dirty?  How much of the race will you be accelerating out of a long sweeper or how long do you plan to be traveling at maximum speed?

What aids are on/off?

Specifically, you need to be thinking about whether “catchup” and/or “slipstream” options are on or off before the race.  This is my opinion.  If you plan to spend the majority of the race at maximum speed and catchup/slipstream are OFF, then use the Adder.  You will do very well walking away from your competition with the benefit of having the greatest top speed.  Almost any other environment demands a Zentorno if your priority is having the most performance-oriented vehicle for the given conditions.  One of the issues I have with catchup, specifically, is that it limits the top speed of the leading car, which makes the top speed of the Adder almost null.  Furthermore, I do not believe the Adder’s other performance areas make up for the overall top speed.  While it is easy to drive, it falls short in all other categories when compared to the Zentorno, and the top speed of the two cars is very close.  I would rather be able to accelerate quickly back up to top speed after getting passed or hit than gamble trying to maintain that speed that is limited by catchup.

Dare I say, the Zentorno is the best overall performance car?  I would have to say “yes, with some exceptions”.  In the twisties, the Entity is your car.  If you really, really need that extra tiny bit of top speed, then the Adder is your car (aids will play into this decision).  Otherwise, your best bet in my opinion, is the Zentorno.

Stay tuned for more reviews, and as always, I am open to discussion and further investigation.

Live fast, die young.

The PS3 February Crew Party Announcement

Hello again my pretty princesses… princessi? It’s only been a little over two weeks since the party, but February doesn’t have as many dates (See what I did there?) as the other months, so we have to get more work done is less time. That got us thinking, ‘time travel’.

This month we’ll be warping space and time, traveling through decades to wherever we’re needed most, much like in that old 1938 Vice City radio program “The Time Ranger”. Though our method of time travel will be slightly different due to the absence of personal penile time travel apparatuses, so instead we’ll do our traveling a la Quantum Leap. At the party we’ll make our way to the quantum leap accelerator and leap into the past, which gives you the role of someone from that time. The only way to leap to the next place and person is to right a mistake that person made in the past, thus changing history.


The details are as follows:

  • The party will be on February 28 at 21.00 GMT
  • PS4 players (or any rioter who owns a PS3 for that matter) are more than welcome to join in on the fun.
  • Each playlist represent a different decade with it’s own little story. The stories will get their own blog post with extra details e.g. the dress code.
  • Make sure you read the stories and keep them with you as you play, otherwise it’s just casual mayhem. You all did last time, so I’m sure this’ll go well again this month. I’m proud of you lad(d)ies! :)
  • After the playlists we will do manhunts. The host will place a bounty on someone. That person then gets a 5 minute head start. Whoever kills the hunted places a bounty on someone else, then the whole thing repeats. It got a bit messy last time, but I’m sure we can pull this off. A more detailed description on how to play manhunts will be included in the story post.
  • If you have any further questions, please contact one of the reps listed below.

The Stories:

1931, The Big Squeeze:

A film noire-esque playlist taking place during the final years of prohibition in Los Santos. The Los Santos Crime Family and The City Hall Gang go to war over the bootlegging rackets in the state. Only one faction will take the prize.

The Reps:

  • Muhmuhhuh
  • Mniscus (xMINTYFRESHx)
  • Grody-to-the-max (raxo-d)

A Racer’s Perspective: Sports Car Class Review


I’ve owned several cars, more than I can count, and have done various forms of motorsport for pleasure, including drift, drag, gymkhana, autocross and rallycross. I am a religious Forza and Gran Tourismo player, but have always had a soft spot for the GTA series.

One thing I have noticed with our blog is that many of you are passionate about your vehicles, but I have not seen a thorough breakdown of each car. Granted, that is a BIG task, considering there are tons of cars on GTA, but I thought I would at the very least give it a shot and try to give you a rundown of the cars by class that are quick and/or stylish in GTA V. Continue reading